“it appears to me that the kids of this generation were born with a gene that instills a kind of “boldness” in them previous ones didn’t seem to possess; something that makes them feel the last word in a conversation belongs to them and they’ll have it regardless of who they’re talking to. ok, that kind of thinking probably isn’t as fresh as i’ve made it out to be; i’m just saying i don’t remember kids ever being as audacious as they are now in saying the things to their parents that i’d probably merely thought…for fear of getting backhanded after the words had left my lips. is there no concern over catching a “reverse palm” in the mouth from your mother anymore? or whatever it is dads do when you sass them? (a karate chop to the throat i guess, i wouldn’t know…) because honestly, i don’t see any trepidation in kids about how they respond to their parents nowadays.
i saw this scene play out yesterday…
mom: “turn that game off before we…”
her daughter: (interrupting) “i am turning it off, i heard you. i have to…”
something, something… she said more words but i had tuned out everything but her tone by then. it was aggressive, bordering on violent, and i half-expected for the girl to get into her mother’s face if the woman had responded to what she’d said. look, i’ll be honest. in the past i would’ve just chalked this exchange up to how white parents allow their kids to talk to them, impertinent like that, because they want to be their kid’s friend rather than their parent. not that i don’t understand wanting to form a strong relationship with your kids; just form the right one. but i’m going off on another tangent…my point is i was wrong; having witnessed it with my own eyes, i’ve found this kind of insolence from children transcends race these days. black, white, red, blue, green…kids of every color are doing the same thing because for some reason they all think someone telling them to do something requires their feedback. and apparently there aren’t many people teaching them it usually doesn’t.
i wrote before that it was the fear of getting backhanded forced me to be cautious in how i responded to my mother giving me instructions, but i think that it had to do more with an awareness of not wanting to be blatantly disrespectful to her. so i did what i was told without interjecting my opinion on the subject. not that i was a perfect kid (because i wasn’t); or that i agreed with everything that she said (because i didn’t); but i recognized even at a young age, as a single mother she had enough stress to deal with raising three kids by herself; she didn’t need me adding more by talking back every time she was being a mom to me. maybe that was just me though.
i must be naïve to think yesterday’s situation should’ve played out like this…
mom: “turn that game off before we…”
her daughter: (turns off game without speaking)
imagine that… “parent tells kid to do something… kid does it immediately…and without opening their mouth…” hmmm…when did that become the exception and not the rule?
but i don’t have any kids so what do i know right?”
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