October 7, 2012

Writes..."An Od"E""


“it’s in the dark of night, whilst laying in my bed,
the most insightful notions swirl ‘round in my head…
profound; i reflect at times i should be asleep,
i’ve found in thinking of her, thoughts are always deep…

and i'll admit to thinking about her a lot;
perhaps more than i should, considering she’s not…
mine, yet i’d never view her as a possession,
‘though i wish she were is my averse confession…

i'm hesitant to profess the feelings i own…
they remain hidden from her; a secret unknown…
thus i'm forced to contemplate while under cover;
how she’ll know my heart without knowing i love her?

'cept she knows, just views my words in another sense…
merely a phrase from a friend, she sees no difference…
my "i love you" isn’t one really meaning love,
at least not from the one i have loving thoughts of…

am i wrong to believe what i say should mean more,
especially when she’s heard “i love you” before?
from those who whispered it sweetly into her ears;
and as both proved empty, they’d reduced her to tears…

but never mine, i understand before i speak,
when they come from me, they’re three words truly unique…
‘though the “more” may be more difficult to explain,
it means when others fade away, that we'll still remain…

having been a constant since the day we first met,
i’ll always be by her side so she not forget;
that even when she can’t see it, in someone’s eyes,
she’s more beautiful than even she does realize…

i’ve observed the striking face and the gorgeous smile;
seen she’s flawless with her clothes, her make-up, her hairstyle…
and i appreciate every part as a whole,
but find her best feature to be her caring soul…

sometimes i wonder exactly how she sees me…
just as her friend? well, our friendship happens to be,
a most valuable gift to be able to claim…
ask her and i’m sure that she will tell you the same…

yet we're destined for more, at least i’ve always felt,
even if the chances of an “us” have seemed svelte…
but that idea concealed means i'm not understood;
so, like i said, i think ‘bout her more than i should…

times when i imagine she’s prone under a sheet…
dead to the world, for two or three hours complete…
and dreaming lovely dreams of the most wondrous kind;
ones that prove the day's stresses have been left behind…

like the one where she's wearing a white dress that flows,   
her hands rest on her arms as the wind gently blows…
brown eyes; a witness to the most amazing view:
a beach of white sand leading to the ocean blue…

and maybe, just maybe, she’s placed me in a scene…
where we, together, share a moment that’s serene;
peaceful; calm; a setting we deem intimate bliss…
concluding nothing before's been better than this…

no one, with whom she or i had spent any time,
had produced an ambience for us as sublime…
in my vision, ardor’s finally by my side;
proof that when true love is real, it won’t be denied…

but i know that's just wishful thinking on my part…
the results of evicting what lives in one's heart…
this ode penned is emotion settled on a page;
and all sentiment: payment of a lover’s wage…

these are the thoughts in a moonlit room i conceive;
praying when morning comes what she reads she'll believe… 
i hope that i won't discover my words betray,
a man who knows love through what his mouth wouldn't say…”


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