Writes..."Walking Hand In Hand"

"all i say is that i want a woman to walk hand in hand with. that's all i say when people ask me what i want for myself in this life. to not walk alone. to not feel alone. i stand at the edge of nothingness and find myself staring back at myself, a reflection created by my own tears. promises unkept echo in the darkness around me. "you won't be alone", yet i spend my days talking to myself. "i'll always be here", yet i awaken to find no one in my bed. all i have are my memories of what we were. a time when we stood in front of each other, exposed and vulnerable. a single tear ran down her cheek, not from sadness or pain, but from the realization that in that moment we were offering everything we were to one another. when edgar allan poe wrote, "we loved with a love that was more that love", he was talking about me and her. a love more than love. that's the only way to describe it when the words "i love you" seem inadequate. i'd tell her i loved her and she'd said she knew. not because i told her, because she knew. what we shared was more than love. it was love squared or love to the power of..., i don't know, it was just more. it wasn't about words. it wasn't about feelings. it was about knowing. us knowing that what was in each other's hearts. us seeing love in one another's eyes. us experiencing love in one another's touch. every time i placed her hand in my own, every time our lips met, we knew. so i cling to the memories of what we were, crying, though the shadows offer me no comfort. because i still know. i know you never lose what we had once you've had it. neither time or space, them or the next, nothing, allows you to forget, to let go. the cold, untouched sheets masking the spot she used to sleep won't let me let go. my one-sided debate on something i know she'd want to argue about won't let me let go. me writing this right now won't let me let go. and because i'm not letting go i gotta believe that this time and space is only transient. "and in the end when it's all said and done...", we won't be alone cause she'll be walking hand in hand with me."