"today it's come to my attention that an opportunity to be with someone i liked a long time ago may be possible. i'm intrigued by this but i can't help but think of the lesson i learned from "candide". voltaire wrote about a dude who wanted a chick, waited years to get her, got her and then realized how "blah" his life with her was. and how maybe he shouldn't have spent all those years pining over a woman that he'd find out didn't exactly wow him. but maybe blah's the wrong word, in the end he realized that he was content with her. maybe being content with someone is enough. when they were younger he thought she would make him happy. but reality taught him that the fantasies he had of them being together were indeed fantasies. and with the illusions erased, contentment was all that was left. but i am not feeling that. i don't want to be content with anything; i want to be happy. so i'm left with this question. if my situation and this guy's are the same, would it be better to leave this opportunity alone? i mean, i'm a pretty smart guy. wouldn't it be a safe assumption that the thoughts i used to have about us are unrealistic and that it may be better to let these thoughts remain what they are? thoughts."
sometime around the beginning of '10. just finished today.
This is a remarkable piece...it poses the question...Can u be fully happy with your fantasy or dream partner. I believe that it can go either way but if u hav a great friendship with the other person already than u shud leave things the way they are...things will change when and if they are meant. But I guess you'll never know.I think people shud feel their fear and do things anyways..Ur either gonna hav pain and heartbreak or never be as happy as u can possibly be..:-)
ReplyDeletedear anonymous,
ReplyDeletethank you for kind words about my work. you asked if you can be fully happy with your fantasy or dream partner and i'll just say that you can't until you accept that you have to develop that "great friendship" with that person in reality and have made significant strides towards doing so. i've never understood how people can try to be with one another person and not be friends first. establish that and the foundation is set for a relationship.
as for the last part, i agree with you: a person can let the fear of potential pain and heartbreak prevent them from experiencing something that could make them truly happy. but the truth is if you really want to be happy then the promise of being happy has to outweigh the idea that you could get hurt.
I agree wholeheartedly...if u want to be happy u have to be willing to put that idea in front of your fear.
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