Writes..."The Next Time"

"i sit here wondering if i can make the next time i kiss her feel like the last time i kissed her, when our future was bright and our possibilities endless. could be she pulls up as i stand waiting for her, smiling the biggest smile my face can achieve. my hands reaching for the door before she can even put her car in park or unbuckle her seatbelt. and she laughs. i've missed her laugh. i tear up, she has no idea how much i've missed her. i help her out of the car and she can see my eyes are watery, which causes her to tear up as well. i take her hand in my own, using the other to wipe away her tears. and as we stand face-to-face the moment is surreal. i pull her closer to me, close enough to press my forehead against hers and plant kisses on it. she looks up with a knowing smile. i slide one hand to her neck and the other to the side of her face, leaning down as she stands on her tiptoes. there's electricity when our lips meet, a single current surges through both of our bodies. my tongue gently probing, she instinctly grants me access to her mouth. we don't kiss as much as we share passion. and it feels like the last time i kissed her. what if i lead her off the nature trail and under a tree that shelters us from a light rain, so that we can taste each other once again. and that feels like the last time i kissed her. with so many "could be's" and "what if's", i don't know. maybe it's not even possible. maybe we've let too much life come between us for that. but i've come to realize that the only differences between the last time and now are the time that's elapsed and the distance that's grown. i still feel everything i felt for her the last time i put my lips on hers. still, maybe i shouldn't be trying to re-create the last time. maybe the next time is another beginning and what will become that nostaglic moment we look back on one day. when we go, "remember the first time we kissed" and we know that even though it wasn't the first time we actually kissed, it was the first time we truly kissed. the first time following the absence of us in one another's lives. the first time after we realized that we weren't good without one another. and it'll be better then the last time because we'll know these things from having experienced them."