Re-Writes..."Extremes"

“i’m sorry. i know it seems that i’m looking for love, instead of letting it come to me. and maybe that’s not what you want. maybe you’ve always let love come to you, let whatever happen, happen with whoever you were with at that time. but i’ve never been like that. i’m a guy who goes to extremes. in the past, i just never placed myself in a relationship. i didn’t think i could handle. in any aspect. i wasn’t looking for love, or anything else. i kept myself in my studies, working on my intellectual side. trying to learn everything i could. but because i was doing this, my social skills never developed. interaction with others, especially girls, became difficult. and so i began to look at movie romances as the, no, my concept of love. the idea of meeting someone who completely captures my heart and wanting to spend the rest of my life with them. i began to long for this. so it was me at one extreme or the other. either totally alone, with no one to love or stuck in a fantasy, that maybe only exists in the movies. no in between. so if it seems i’m looking for love, it’s because i haven’t found a middle ground yet. but i’m still looking.”

sometime in '00 or '01, i don't remember the exact date.